hello bad moods. goodbye calm girl. why are you like this. whats wrong. whats wrong ? HAHA. oh what a nice question. whats wrong aye. everything's wrong. didnt you say yur gonna be fine and you're not gonna be like this anymore saying that everything's wrong and nothing's going right. what do you know. you know no shit. my dad doesnt recognise only me. he doesnt smile at me and asks who am i everytime i visit. everytime i go ther i dont even know what to say. hes gonna leave soon. i know he is. and i know it stops his pain and suffering and end al this sadness, but what do you know. what the fcuk do you know. it isnt easy. its not. i can be strong. but i cant be so when i see my mom so tired. if you took a look at her face, you'd think she's not been sleepin ever. and yes, she hasnt. i hear her cry at night. i see her eyes so red and she just looks so worn out. thers nothing i can do. i tried so many times and ways to make her smile. she just keeps quiet and cries when my dad smiles at her, not knowng whats going wrong. what the fcuk do you guys know. "oh dawn. dont be like this. cheerup. im sure yur dad wont want to see you like this." oh please. he doesnt even know who i am. i know yur just tryna give me some support but its just makng me feel worse. not everyone's going through this. its easy to ask someone to cheer up. but you know it isnt easy to do so yurself. and i hate it. i dont wanna live this lie. i cant help it either. i dont practise what i preach. so what. at least the people around me aint sad nomore. at least in the end only i feel sad. you fool. you dontkno how many people care for you out ther. you senseless moron. cant you feel their care and concern. yet yur just selfishly rantng al the way like nobody's business. i didnt ask you to listen anyway. you can just back off if you dont want to. i said before, i need someone who'll listen to me, willingly. i dont care how many people's pissd with me right now. like whatever. im in a bad mood now dont you piss me off. sometimes i dont understand. people are selfish, senseless, and so full of shit. yeah thats what humans are. hypocrites. downright shitty hypocrites. gosh and tmr im gonna see one for three days and two nights. sickening. -and jo; the ps part. sometimes just no one realises. even cyn has kelly now. no offence girl we al know you've been ps-d quite alot. yeah and why. obviously, yur attitude that no one likes. i kinda feel sorry for you. and i know. being ps-d sucks. to the fcukng core. i though.. i thought the team was everything i needed, and had. no. i thought wrong. bet cat hates me now aye. wel yaaawwn. what old news. i dont wanna hate her. if you have the brains, look at how she treats me. and jun qian or any of the others. look at it. see with yor freakng eyes and think with yur freakng brains. thers a diff. BIG diff. im tired. im sick of these. i treat people the way they treat me. does it make a diff if i dont hang out with you guys anymore ? will anyone even notice ? will anyone ask "oh hey whers dawn?" simple answer. hell no. :)